When you’re suffering you will consistently focus on the things in your life that you don’t want, or the things that you fear.
These ’empty thoughts’ will begin to consume you, but have you ever stopped in those moments and ask yourself “What do I want?”
With everyone I have helped, as soon as I ask this question they will come up with a vague suggestion, a sort of vision… but as soon as they even begin to describe it, they will talk themselves out of it!
They don’t even answer the question, as they begin to ‘Rationalize’ or ‘be realistic’ or entirely shut down their dreams as soon as they start to even think of them.
Perhaps that’s one of the greatest weaknesses of growing up, that we forget to dream, we actually build a case for the reasons why we can’t have what we want before we even think…WHAT WOULD I WANT?
It’s only a question…
If you could have anything you wanted what would it be?
“I don’t know”
What if you did know?
“Well I guess I’d have a nice house…but I could NEVER afford that and..and…and”
Stop... Just stop:
Instantly you start to provide excuses and even in some cases, evidence of the reasons why you can’t have what you would want.
but let me ask you this If you don’t know what you want, do you think you’re ever going to get it?
It’s okay… it’s okay…
But is it possible, that because you don’t know what you want, that is causing you to feel lost, empty or unfulfilled, maybe even like you don’t matter?
But if I think about what I want and don’t get it I will be EVEN MORE UPSET!
Not so fast… You’re assuming that just because you know what you want, that you’re going to have to face all the realities and problems that come with that, and it almost feels hopeless…
But look again, this question holds no intent, no pressure to act, no ‘do by date’
It’s simply a question:
What would you want for:
Would your partner be lazy? Passionate? …home all the time!? Caring or maybe more strong and certain, have fun with it! Start with things that you don’t like and then just reverse it.
“They better not spend all their money and time in the pub!”
becomes: “They always have time for me and we experience things together”
Cottage in the mountains? Maybe you're like me and dream of a beachfront house in a warm country! A sky lodge with a hot tub! A modern apartment overlooking a vast city! Your own little family home, a mansion!!
Be creative, enjoy writing down those little details “Has to have Lime curtains and smell of lavender”
Enough to have adventures, Enough to have my days off!, enough to have a fast motorbike on an open road, Where I never have to worry again! it’s okay for this to be realistic, most people have such a negative belief of money that their vision is realistic, you get to decide!
“I JUST WISH THE KIDS WOULD STOP FIGHTING!” aha, let it be as silly as it seems, this core template is for you to enjoy, and it can be as daft as you like!
more curves? maybe less? Maybe more muscle or just a lean belly, or just to FEEL confident would be enough, or to get rid of those niggling pains (and believe me they are a pain!!)
Your LIFES WORK?
What would you love to get paid to do every single day that would make you thrive? Detail it! imagine it… who knows, from thinking about it, you may realize you have something special that everyone else may need! … After all, that’s how Petential began….
Your day-to-day adventure?
Relaxing day with the family or a huge hike up a mountain! maybe to travel or play a show in front of thousands! Who knows but it’s your adventure, i’d go as deep as detailing exactly what it feels like when It’s happening too!
How does this help me?!
You may cry the first time you write these ideas down, you may laugh, you may feel them as a reality.
But this helps you by:
What you focus on and think about, your brain will start to see! There is a filter in the brain, this will change the way you see the world. Ever bought a new game, or car, or dress and started seeing it everywhere? Maybe someone said something to make you feel like you weren’t attractive…and suddenly for the first time ever in the mirror… you started to see evidence to support it?
That is how the brain works, and if you know and focus on specifically what you want, you will start to see and look for opportunities for it! You may even start to take some risks! Or even notice when something isn’t in alignment with that template, you could then stand up for yourself and avoid it!
Secondly: You have somewhere to hide from the ’empty thoughts’ I often talk about writing down your empty thoughts as soon as they begin to rise, possibly even drawing a cage around them, but when you’re awake at night and that’s all you have to focus on…then they will haunt you. Instead what you must do, is pick up the Core template that you have designed, read it… feel the feelings of it as if it was your reality… FORGET THAT IT’S NOT REALITY RIGHT NOW. This is to get you to sleep (at first)
Focus until the empty thoughts are no more
Every successful person talks about how it all started with a vision, it all started with a small idea or trusting that the dots will connect down the road, some even believed it even though there was no evidence for it and yet somehow it came true!
This vision, this template is yours, it’s yours to escape the noise when things get dark.
It's there to DIRECT YOU on the paths you should follow, not what everyone else tells you to follow.
It becomes an indicator of what’s right and good for you!
It becomes a new way of looking at the world.
If you start to set goals towards it too, you’ll soon see that you get so much closer to it than if you never dreamed so wildly in the first place.
When you know what you want, you begin to know yourself.
When you know yourself AND SEE PROGRESS…Then the empty thoughts go away.
“Aim for the moon, because even if you miss… you’ll land among the stars”